Mad's Not Bad

MANTRA TIME!
✨MAD’S NOT BAD✨MAD’S NOT BAD✨MAD’S NOT BAD✨

✨ALL FEELINGS ARE OK✨

Anger and sadness? They get a bad rap. But feeling mad is valuable info! It usually means:
🤬Something wasn’t ok with you
🤬Someone hurt you
🤬You’re scared or overwhelmed
🤬You're upset about something totally unrelated, and need a RELEASE

Tune into the mad. It’s OK to feel mad! Yes, even you, you brilliant parent. Stuffing down that anger is going to bring out an explosion later on. Instead? Notice it coming, take a break, and LET THAT SH*T OUT in healthy ways: Working out, journaling, venting, punching a punching bag, whatever works for YOU.

And for our kids? YES! Even your little one is allowed to feel mad, in fact, it’s healthy!

I hear you, they're freaking out because the crayon is too purpley. BUT, when you respond to your kid's anger by telling them to calm down, stop crying, or sending them to a timeout, you're telling your child MAD IS BAD.

And when they're older? When they feel mad because someone touched them in a way they didn't want, or did something they didn't like, they'll shove that anger deep down in those moments, rather than FEEL ANGER and stick up for themselves.🤯

The goal? Help your toddler/child:

💫Recognize their anger
💫Name it
💫Accept it
💫Release it safely
💫Build coping skills

And? There’s a HUGE difference between the “feeling” and the “behavior."

✨The FEELING is ok. The behavior is not✨

Here's how you show them:
✨ACCEPT & ACKNOWLEDGE
“You were still playing with that! You’re feeling so mad that he took it from you.”

✨OK THE FEELING
“It’s ok to feel mad. That IS upsetting.”

✨BOUNDARY
“It’s ok to feel mad. It’s not ok to hit. I’m going to help keep everyone safe.” (Calmly move the child being hit, or gently move the hitter aside for a calm down moment).

Then later when your toddler is calm:

✨TEACH THE COPING SKILLS✨
“Next time, what can you do when you're feeling angry? Yes! You could say, ‘I’m still playing with this. You can have it when I’m done!’

This post was brought to you by @biglittlefeelings. More than a toy designer, be mindful is a community of parents who are going through the process of building the best denizens of next generation.  As such we encourage and delight in our community participating in our blog and social media efforts.  Your voice will be heard across our community and who knows which kid or which parent your wisdom will enlighten!  Feel free to email us at howdy@mindful-engineering.com or submit an inquiry on our site if you have a blog post idea you want to share!