8 Things to Try Before Yelling
Hey pandemic parents,
What else would you add?
Yelling is something many parents struggle with and wish they did less of. Why do we yell? Here’s a few possible reasons:
Old patterns
Last resort
Exhaustion
Overwhelmed
Unprocessed emotions
If we are prone to yelling and our child is not responding, it’s possible they’ve developed a defense against it in order to protect themselves. If there is no imminent danger, before you yell pause & notice what you're experiencing.
Pause may look like closing your eyes, taking an exaggerated deep breath (exhalation being longer than the inhalation), or walking away. -
“I see the drawing on the wall and I’m experiencing some big feelings, I need a break. I will be right back.”
Then notice what you’re experiencing.
If you’re overwhelmed because your child has destroyed the room - that makes sense.
If you’re angry because your children keep fighting - that makes sense.
As we make sense of our own experiences we can return to our child and ask a question rather than yell. Or we may reflect on how we would have liked to have been approached when we were little in a similar situation.
Remember to care for yourselves, even if it means three minutes of deep breathing in the morning while you sit alone in the bathroom!
This post was brought to you by @conscious.parents. More than a toy designer, be mindful is a community of parents who are going through the process of building the best denizens of next generation. As such we encourage and delight in our community participating in our blog and social media efforts. Your voice will be heard across our community and who knows which kid or which parent your wisdom will enlighten! Feel free to email us at howdy@mindful-engineering.com or submit an inquiry on our site if you have a blog post idea you want to share!
