5 Ways to Respond to Your Child's Mistake
When your child makes a mistake showing compassion and interest in your child and trying to understand the internal drive that led them to the action, helps your child develop self-compassion and compassion toward others.
When you mess up in some big or small way, does your internal narrative sound like this? “Gosh, I’m so stupid! I should know better than to...I can’t get anything right, ugh!”
If it does then you’re not alone and this post applies to you as much as your child.
Mistakes are part of being human. Kids drop their milk cup because they’re being silly and playing at the table or because it truly was an accident. If your immediate reaction is frustration, you don’t need to suppress it. In fact suppressing it will only cause it to come up in other often unhelpful ways. What you can do is attempt to stop. Stop long enough to mentally acknowledge your frustration and let your body return to a state of calm. Each time you practice this you are creating a bigger gap between the patterns you learned and the patterns you are creating. Then show compassion toward your child, doing so helps them learn that making mistakes is acceptable. Not being perfect is acceptable.
If spilled milk is something you address with compassion and curiosity then explore what mistakes are harder for you to accept. What if they cut their beautiful long hair? Or they hide their grades from you? They fail a class? What if they destroy a family heirloom while roughhousing?
Can you still show compassion and curiosity?
Thinking through the things that you are less likely to show compassion on can be a good way for you to get curious on why there is resistance. Behavior is communication so stay interested. 💛Sidu
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